Apotheke

I took a cab to china town. Somewhere between Bowery and Pell and a stoned faced door man was where I was meeting my childhood friends for a small birthday celebration that I had almost ditched out on. Nothing very special nothing very exciting. After three Vintage Margaritas, I went to meet D out side his apartment and we went to go have a cheap drink at a dive bar in the neighborhood thats sports a jukebox and a pool table. P was there. I hadn't seen them in a month or more. I was being pulled in two directions and had a hard time deciding what I was doing and if I should allow any conversation go in the wrong directions. But after a couple of more beers, and the return of Pelagia, the drunk babble came out. For once it wasn't me. Dimitri listens with care and draws you in with his ability to observe and take in and all the while do it all calmly. It makes you feel at ease. I told him the story of P. and he left a bit later requesting breakfast and a recap before bed. P/ started his ramble. And it was a long list of excuses and fears and whys. I felt bad that I could not feel that way. I felt bad that I was going to walk out and he was going to again be a sort of victim to his insecurities and just wont allow himself the ability to revel in the moment.
I walked home drunk on 14th street. Stopped and ate some thing that resembled a frankfurter and bought a pack of cigarettes. Sleep took me over and it was once again way too late for me to enjoy more than 4 hours.
I sent Dimitri a message and letting him now how I held out. Breakfast at 12 was later and waiting.
And the train ride home was longer than normal...